Getting Older

Getting Older
Just a few months ago, I celebrated my twenty-second birthday. I couldn’t help but realize how  strange it was- feeling like it was just yesterday that I was sixteen and a junior in high school dreaming of college and the places after that. Now, if only I was sixteen again and wasn’t worrying about  getting older and trying to get most out of life as possible.
On my birthday, people kept asking me the typical “do you feel older” question. I just laughed it off, as does anyone who doesn’t really know the best way to answer a question, But no. I didn’t feel older. I don’t think anyone ever physically feels older on their birthday…except for maybe for the twenty-first birthday when you can legally do more, but for twenty-two, no. It is just as pointless as twenty was. But, one thing I did realize: although I did not feel older, I came to the mental realization that I am getting older. It is a completely different feeling and brings on a completely different set of emotions, and possibly a few “quarter-life” crises.
I am getting older and life around me is making even more aware of that. Going back to the time of my birthday, graduation was growing near, I was packing up my student apartment, and watching my younger friends pick out their class schedules for the next year. I was officially getting into that “real-world” adulthood phase that was always looming around the corner and now it has finally crept up on me. It all seems so final.
Life during college seems to go by SO much faster than my high-school years and I feel that these quick years will become the norm. With everyday being close to a cycle and planning dates throughout the next year in my planner, it is no wonder how people get into this never-ending cycle in life and before we know it 2015 will be here in a blink of an eye.
So, with everything I have just typed out for the world to see, I am making a pact: a goal to treat everyday as bringing me something new, to pay attention to the small things throughout my day that I might not have noticed before, to wake up positively, to do my best to try new things, make spontaneous decisions, and to, overall, find my passions in life and pursue them. Because after college, there is no longer that sense of “I can do everything and try everything because I am a student taking classes with no rent, real responsibilities, or anything holding me down”. Life suddenly gets real.

Rambles from the Past: “Graduation and Life After It”

Below is a recount of idling thoughts I scribbled into my notebook in the days leading up to one of my biggest accomplishments: College graduation.
Thirty-six. The daily countdown has officially commenced. In thirty-six days, I will be walking across THAT stage in cap and gown and with that (hopefully) graceful walk, I will end my days as an undergraduate student.
That sentence seems so foreign to me.
College student is the only title I’ve gone by and all I’ve known in these past four years. Even crazier thought: I have been a “student” for the past seventeen years (since kindergarten). And with that Walk, it will be over. That chapter in my “Book of Life” will close and it will be time to start a new one. One that will include joining the real, and somewhat scary, adult world. I will soon have to find a “real” job, start paying my own bills, and ultimately adjust to living life without the safety blanket that is college. I will leave the friends and family I created here for a fresh beginning- one that will hopefully take me to the west coast. I have begun to realize what matters, who matters, and who will realistically still be someone close in my life. I think back on all of the memories-some bad, some good, some so crazy that it leaves me thinking how did I ever do that- and just get consumed with happiness, because I know I didn’t “waste” my college years. I did incredible things, took advantage of wonderful opportunities, and made the best friends I possibly could.
Scary as it may be, it is also a ridiculous exciting time with what seems like endless possibility. Think about it, come graduation, I will be a young, smart girl with a degree and nothing holding me back from starting a new life. I can move across the country, even across the world, and start MY life. One that I will define however I want. While the job-search seems daunting now, I know I will land a great job somewhere and have even started applying out of state. I cannot wait!
Mostly now, the thoughts that fill my head are mainly concerned with my career path. I feel like the first job you have, will greatly define where you will go in life. Yes, there are “career-changers”, but frankly, I don’t want to be one of them. I want to find something I am completely passionate about and make that my job. I want to love what I do, so that I never feel like I’m working. Because, as you’ve probably heard a million times before: “If you love what you do, You’ll never work a day in your life.” That could not be more true. Over my time in college, I have completed five different internships. Some I absolutely LOVED, and some I absolutely did not. That’s what makes doing internships so great, you basically get a first-hand test run of the job without being committed to it. Then you can find what you love and cross out the options you didn’t love. Cause, believe me, when you don’t enjoy what you’re doing, you will be miserable five days out of the week for everyday you walk into work- and who wants to live like that?
It’s honestly crazy to think, in a mere thirty-six days I will have an entirely different life from the one I’ve known for the past seventeen years.
If only I could make blogging, traveling, and just experiencing all opportunities in life my full-time, paying job. That would be amazing.